Top Ten Reasons to Write about Zombies

In honor of Zombie Awareness Month, I present...

Top Ten Reasons to Write about Zombies

(In no particular order, from the home office of Karina Fabian, author of Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator)

10.  They're the next big trend!  Forget your sparkly vampires--maggoty zombies are the hot literary trope in the fantasy horror world!

…okay, this is really a lame reason to write about them.  Write what you enjoy and what's in your heart--make the trend; don't follow it.  However, this is the first time I actually was part of the current, and it's a new experience for me.  Wonder if it will mean much sales-wise.

9.  Need to incorporate all five senses?  Zombie stench makes that easy!

8. There's so much uncharted territory.  Let's face it--if you have to add glitter to your vampires to make them new, the genre's been done.  Zombies are still wide open.  Really--see the guts?

7. No more pressure to put in that sex scene to bump ratings.

6.  You can abuse them freely.  They're dead.  You can whack off their heads without remorse.  Or, if you choose to go for the legs and leave them crawling and groaning "flesh wound!" it's funny. Bonus--the ASPCA doesn't care about them!

5.  Body humor!  No one can lend you a hand with that better than a zombie!  (From Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator:  " He moved in to cover her while she checked out some zombie spoor: dried skin, a rotting finger, what looked like part of a nose.  Must have been some sneeze. ")

4.  Easy to write dialogue for.

3.  What a literary device.  In Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator, I use zombies as a foil to attack some of the finer aspects of society--conspiracy theorist, radical ecologists, activists, etc.  It was a lot of fun to point at these groups with a rotting finger.

2.  When you've explored all aspects of life, what's left?  Oh, wait!

1.  To prove you have the braaaiiiins for it!

Need your opinion: Which Blurb Makes You Most Want to Read Neeta Lyffe 2

One of the important things writers learn quickly is that it's not just about the manuscript.

Last Wednesday (after pre-loading a blog about the rotten week I'd had), I got the excellent news that Neeta Lyffe 2: I Left My Brains in San Francisco was accepted by Damnation Books. YAY!  *snoopydance*

I can't believe I found this. 

Well, that wonderful news took two days out of my Gapman writing, as I filled out forms for the cover artist, wrote the dedication and acknowledgements (with a few tears, since this is the last book my friend Walt Staples ever critted for me), cut excerpts down to size and wrote the back-cover blurbs.

Now, I seek your help.  I've got six blurbs from what I hope are four different angles.  I asked some trusted authors to narrow it down to three, and pass these on to you, dear readers for evaluation.

Please vote on the one that would most make you read the book.  I'll do a drawing from the comments and send the winner a copy of Neeta 2 when it's out in September.  To win, you must leave me a way to contact you--even a website with a contact page. (Last contest I did, several "winners" lost out because I had no way to find them.)

To make it more fun, you get one chance for your vote, one chance for your comment about why you'd chose it, and one chance for any critique you offer on your choice.

1. Zombie problem? Call Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator.

But not this weekend. She’s on vacation to an exterminator’s convention with her partner and boyfriend Ted, looking to relax, have fun, and have a little romance. Too bad the zombies at the Give Back Underwater Memorial Gardens and Fish Preserve have a different idea. When they rise from watery graves to take over the City by the Bay, it looks like a working vacation after all.

2. Zombie problem? Call Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator...but not this weekend.

On vacation at an exterminator’s convention, she's looking to relax, have fun, and enjoy a little romance. Too bad the zombies have a different idea. When they rise from their watery graves to take over the City by the Bay, it looks like it'll be a working vacation after all.

Enjoy the thrill of re-kill with Neeta Lyffe, Zombie Exterminator.

3. 2047. Zombies are pests, fuel is made from feces, and the rich and famous pay to become fish food.

Zombie exterminators, Neeta Lyffe and Ted Hacker, travel to San Francisco for a zombie convention, a little sightseeing and some romance. But when the fish-food celebrities rise from their watery graves to attack San Francisco, their “working vacation” takes on new meaning.

It’s chainsaws, undead, and romance in this second novel by satirist Karina Fabian.

**Manure-based fuels are important to the plot, but based on feedback, I'm wondering if this helps overcome the repulsive gross factor.

4.  2047. Zombies are pests, cars will soon run on crap, and the rich and famous pay to become fish food.

Zombie exterminators, Neeta Lyffe and Ted Hacker, travel to San Francisco for a zombie convention, a little sightseeing and some romance. But when the fish-food celebrities rise from their watery graves to attack San Francisco, their “working vacation” takes on new meaning.

It’s chainsaws, undead, and romance in this second novel by satirist Karina Fabian.



I'll announce the winner next Thursday.  Thanks!