My friend, Walt Staples

“It is not often that someone comes along who is a true friend and a good writer.” --E.B. White, Charlotte's Web

Most of you know by now that Walt Staples, who was a writer, a member of the Catholic Writers Guild, and my good friend died on Wednesday, March 14. 

I met him through the Guild, in the chat room, I think.  My memory is fuzzy on that, but not on the fact that it was during a chat that I roped him into running for the Guild Presidency.  He won unanimously (not hard with the Guild--officership is still more of a "who'se crazy enough to volunteer?" deal).  He did a great job for six months, before he had to drop out in order to take care of his wife, who had some medical problems.

Still, he and I kept in touch, swapping stories for critique, sharing funny things we'd found, talking over Guild stuff.  Even though he was busy with the stresses at home, he always took time to help the Guild--and others--and me.  After a conversation about humor, he agreed to do a workshop for the Catholic Writers Conference Online (we're running it in his honor again this year.)  When I started a blog about the space industry, he agreed to run a series of columns about growing up in the 50s and 60s and watching the space race. (Find them at Rocket Science for the Rest of Us.) 

We were crit partners, too, and he was always willing to tell it to me straight.  When the romance part of Neeta Lyffe 2 didn't work, he first checked it with his wife and daughter, then told me what was wrong.  The book's vastly improved because of his honesty.

There have been times in my life, too, where I've needed straight-up advice, things where Rob and I were too close to what was happening.  He came through for me, then, too.

I know it's cliche in times like this, but I believe he was a far better friend to me than I was to him.  I loved him dearly and am proud to have known him.  He was a blessing in my life, and I think God that we were friends, even if it was for too short a time.

My Novel's Journey: Neeta Lyffe 2 Revisions

There are a few rules I follow when I send out my manuscripts for critique:

1. Send it to writer friends whose work I respect and whom I trust to tell me the bad as well as the good.
2.  If I send it to others with less experience writing or reading, give them some specific areas to focus on (where am I confusing, where do you lose interest, who do you hate?)
3.  Really consider their opinion--after all, I trusted them enough to ask, right?

I've had a few times where I have disregarded a critiquer's advice, but often, they are right on target.  This happened last month with Neeta Lyffe.  One of my writing friends wrote me that, long story short, the first chapter didn't work.  Neeta came off as old, whiny and weak, and neither he nor his wife or daughter wanted to read anymore.

The great thing about Walt is that he doesn't pull his punches, and he can zero right in on the problem.  He was right:  Neeta is whiny and indecisive, and she feels much older than her 29 years.  However, she has reasons:  in the first book, she had to behead someone under her instruction in order to keep him from returning a zombie.  That's haunting her, as is the fear that someday, she might have to do the same thing to Ted, her partner in the extermination business whom she's in love with.  Ted sometimes operates on a different frequency from the rest of the world, and can come off as flakey or even insensitive, which leaves her confused about where they stand romantically.  So she's dealing with a lot of anxiety, and it's making her insecure and indecisive. 

I thought I was showing that in her behaviors, and while I was, I also didn't give the reader enough clues into the reasons behind her behaviors.  Like my husband likes to say, "It's not my job as a reader to understand; it's the writer's job to be understood."

Fortunately, it wasn't a difficult fix.  I added some nightmares, a psychiatrist, the determination to wean herself from her pills, and she went from whiny to troubled, and Walt was able to sympathize with her rather than dismiss her.

Something else happened, too:  I realized an important subtext hadn't been developed because I skipped over this important part of her situation.  I went through the rest of the manuscript, adding and even changing some things.  We get a little more insight into Ted's motives, too. The entire book is a little richer.

Critiques can be hard to hear, especially when the manuscript really doesn't work.  However, taking the time to consider the comments and work the manuscript pays off.

I should be getting more critiques later this month.  I'm looking forward to them!

My Novel's Journey: Neeta Lyffe II: Conference Fun

Ninja Monkey picture by Donovan84.

One thing I adore about writing conferences is that I always get the BEST ideas from the workshop homework.

This year, I chose three workshops to work on Neeta Lyffe II: I Left My Brains in San Francisco--Real-world worldbuilding and Obviously, God has a sense of humor, both done by my good friend Walt Staples; and Structuring characters, by Tanya Stowe.

What I loved about each of these (and the others I took) was that they gave just a little bit of theory, some practical examples, then presented a challenge for me to apply the ideas to my own work.

In the worldbuilding, we examined different aspects of creating a fictional world based on reality: doing research, seeing the world through your characters eyes and creating characters that are a natural result of your world. I already knew my world pretty well from Neeta Lyffe, but not only did this give me a chance to apply it to San Francisco (and to determine where I need more research), I also came up with some funny ideas--like the Ninja Monkey Dance! (It "was" all the rage in the early 2020s.) I also rounded out where the zombie invasion will come from, and came up with a couple of minor characters. Here's one.

Chenille: A student at ArtsInstitute-San Francisco, Chenille is into environmental art. She's a fangirl of Hollister Grant, the scientific "genius" behind the Global Fattening theory, which says that climate destabilization is not caused by warming or cooling but by the uneven distribution of the human population due to rampant urbanization. When Grant returns as a zombie (which Neeta re-kills), Chenille's deepest desire is fulfilled when Ted affirms that yes, the fish had indeed nibbled at his corpse, before he returned to shore.

In humor, Walt explained some of the basic conventions of humor--slice of life, the double-take, the change-up pitch, the build and pop--and challenged us to write something for each. I'd never dissected humor before, and Walt is as funny in his lectures as in his stories. Here's my "final exam":

When they entered the trade show floor, Ted grabbed Neeta's forearm. "Rule One of trade shows," he instructed. "Always stop first and take it allllll in."

Neeta made a visual sweep of the floor. Dark fabric on piped made booths where entrepreneurs demonstrated and sold the tool of her trade, some with flat-screens playing videos to show their superior effectiveness. This year, the cleaning products and containers dominated the row farthest away from the food court; at least their complaints had paid off. Nothing like trying to enjoy the convention center's clam chowder with someone spraying chlorine bleach from a supersoaker only a dozen feet away. That aisle had been reserved for protective equipment: rubber boots and biohazard suits, gloves and motorcycle helmets. Vendors selling the more practical equipment took up the middle. Swords and chainsaws, and…was that a lirpa? Every year, he brings a few of those, and every year some Star Trek fan figures if he can't use it at work, at least it will look impressive on his wall.

To the back, they saw a spout of flame and heard a shout, but the sprinklers didn't go off. Someone must have gotten to the extinguishers in time. The flamethrower guys usually knew what they were doing.

And, of course, sticking out like a guilded thumb, a stage for Zombie Death Extreme. Saturday, she was going to have spend half the day there schmoozing people in the name of a contract she only signed to get out of debt last year.

She shrugged. Looked like any other zombie exterminator trade show her mom had dragged her through as a kid, but when she looked at Ted, she saw his eyes glowing like it was Christmas.

"So?" he asked. "Monofilament swords first, or the flamethrowers?"

"Remember our budget?" she said.

"Hey, a guy can dream!"

I never took a creative writing course, so Tanya's information was wonderfully new to me--about the character arc, the "dark moment" every protagonist must have, relationship barriers, tangible objectives... I must admit, it was so late at night when I did that assignment, I read it as "tangible OBJECT" and was rather confused until the next lesson. Tanya also patiently led me through several tries in pinning some of this down, as a result of which, I understand my "love triangle" of Neeta, Ted and Marcel a lot better. I came up with a fun scene where they are at a convention dance, and Marcel tries to woo Neeta on the dance floor and does a pretty fair job of it, but Ted steps in and wins her over with--you guess it!--the Ninja Monkey.

A fun advantage of this was that I showed my family the Ninja Monkey. My husband danced it with me, and my daughter just stared and shrugged. "And my friends wonder where I get it."

The CWCO is done for a year, and I can't say I'm not relieved--it's a lot of work--but I'm so grateful for the wonderful presenters and the opportunity to build up my book. If you have a chance to attend a conference, online or live, then I highly encourage it!