Chicago Printer's Row Book Fair Report

Despite disappointing sales, the Chicago Tribune Printer's Row Book Fair was a lot of fun. In all, I sold five books: two of Passport, two of Seven Archangels: Annihilation, and one of Firestorm of Dragons. (I could have sold two more of these, but it was kids interested in it and I had to warn them that one story is really PG-13 or more.) I passed out a lot of information, and on the last day, went to each booth and gave information to each new bookstore owner who had a booth. I hope it makes an impact.

It's very interesting having a Christian/Catholic table at a book fair. I had one person very interested in Emily's Hope until the woman found out NFP stood for Natural Family Planning. Another person looked at "Seven Archangels: Annihilation" and even though it's a fantasy story about angles battling Satan, declared. "The Exorcist was too scary for me--I could never read this!" (Catholic fiction=The Exorcist. Wow.) Another person called me "Sister." I was wearing a skirt, but are there any religious orders that wear fedoras instead of wimples?

I did meet a sister, a member of the Daughters of St Paul and learned a little about her order's publishing company. I also met the pastor of St. Vianney Parish and gave him a bunch of books for his parish's library. They want to hold a series of lectures on Catholic writing. Makes me wish I lived closer.

When things were slow, I did some readings of different books. One person loved Tannia Ortiz-Lopez's poem "Who Am I?" and took a flier. Hope he'll get the book. I had a lot of folks take fliers, so perhaps some later sales will come from it.

Of course, I was there with The Writers' Café Press/Lost Genre Guild, who applied for the table I was manning. Cyn and Scott are terrific people. We spent a lot of time hawking each other's books, keeping on the lookout for interesting people, swapping bunny ears for photos, and talking about faith in science fiction. Frank and I discussed free will as the true test for artificial intelligence and swapped stories on our latest projects while sitting in a drizzle waiting for Cynthia to come back from Menard's with a tarp. And Frank got me stuffed crust pizza from the restaurant that invented it. Oooooo--nibbled that all the way home!

Chicago weather had a lot of fun with us. We went early to my friend's farm in S. Beloit, and were treated to days of showers and severe thunderstorms and threats of tornadoes. Saturday of the fair, tornadoes hit the suburbs. Fortunately, on Saturday, we didn't get much wind and only a drizzle right around closing time. With tarps on the tables, we were fine for the night. Sunday started out with gusty winds and some drizzling. We didn't get a lot of traffic, so Frank and I decided to leave Cynthia to man the booths while we wandered the booths and peddle our wares to the booksellers themselves. While in the actual bookstore on Printer's Row, the sky opened up and we had a deluge with high winds--so bad, tents were sliding down the street despite being weighed down with barrels of water. When we got back to the booth, Cynthia had managed to get tarps on both tables--despite the wind blowing both tarps and her shirt up--and finally just sat on the tables to weigh them down. We piled stuff on the tables while she ran for the car. It slowed some as we packed, and by the time we'd finished, it had stopped. By then, of course, we were not just dripping but weighed down by the water in our clothes. We drove to the parking garage where my van was and changed clothes ducked behind the car doors. My felt fedora is still drying out and it's Thursday!

I went home and dried out the books--about 20 got water damage, though only 3 were in really bad shape.

Overall, the book fair was fun to do, but I don't think I'll ever try to sell books that way again. Everyone who sent me their books to sell has been very understanding--and frankly, I don't think any of the new-books tables sold much--but I feel awful that I couldn't do more for them. If there's ever a next time, I'll only have a few books to put on the table and hand out more stuff.

And maybe I'll sell ice water and umbrellas instead.

On Vacation

On vacation until June 14. If you're in Chicago, drop gy the LGG booth at the Chicago Tribune Ptinter's Row Book Fair June 7,8.

new story out and going to book fair

My flash fiction story, "Innocents," tied for first place in the Muse Marquee Flash Fiction Contest and will appear in their May issue. You can check it out at the Muse Marquee.

I'm pretty stoked, because I usually don't enjoy or write flash (stories under 500 words), but the opening line for the contest inspired me. My thanks to Lea Schizas for pointing the contest out to me and the Catholic Writers' Guild who critiqued it before I sent it out.

I'm off to the Chicago Printers Row Book Fair. If you're around, check out the LGG/CWO booth and say hi!

Memorial Day Speech by Rob Fabian

Today, Rob and I spent Memorial Day with the Veterans of Foreign Wars in Drake, ND. Rob was invited to give a speech, and we went to the cemetery for the gun salute and laying of the wreath. then we had an enjoyable lunch talking with the vets--comparing notes and swapping stories.



Here's Rob's speech honoring the troops.

Memorial Day Ceremony – Drake ND
Lt Col Robert A. Fabian
DATE: Monday, 25 May 2008, 1000 hrs
EVENT: Memorial Day Ceremony
LOCATION: City Hall, Drake ND
THEME: “Recognizing Those Who Gave Their Lives”

Good morning. I’m honored that you asked me to come back to speak to you again
• And to share this particular day with you all
• Because today is truly a special day across our great Nation
As our President said in his Memorial Day proclamation this year
• Today is the day “we honor the heroes who have laid down their lives in the cause of freedom,
• We “resolve that they will forever be remembered by a grateful nation,”
• And we “pray that our country may always prove worthy of the sacrifices they have made.”
And, at times, the sacrifices have been great indeed …
For more than 230 years, the men and women of our Nation have stood proud and manned the ramparts from which America has guarded its freedom, ideals and values
When it has mattered most, patriots from every corner of our great Nation have taken up the fight
• From Valley Forge to San Juan Hill, and Iwo Jima to Tora Bora
• Men and women in uniform have answered the call to duty with courage and conviction
• And more than 650,000 have paid the eternal price
Every one of those has been a cause for grief
• Every death has devastated families and friends;
• Every death has been mourned by fellow comrades-in-arms on the front lines and at rear bases
• And every death has saddened the American public
While our actions today can never do justice to the sacrifices they have made in our name
• We must honor those who gave their lives that we might live free
• For as Abraham Lincoln once said: “Any nation that does not honor its heroes will not long endure.”
Here in Drake, we join the entire nation and pause with solemn gratitude, deep respect, and unwavering dedication.
• To remember the heroes through the centuries who stood forth for us all
• While the front lines may be different and the equipment may have changed, the fight is still the same: upholding freedom against tyranny
Today, we gratefully remember the guardians who have died defending our freedoms and the American way of life
And that was just their final sacrifice... the greatest among many
• These guardians loved America so much, they spent months and years in foreign lands far away from home and loved ones
• They revered freedom so much, they sacrificed their own in support of a noble cause
• They cherished peace so much, they chose to live as warriors
• And they valued life so much, they were willing to lay theirs down in service to our country
We, as a Nation, honor them, one and all
• And must stand together, to ensure their sacrifices were not in vain
• That the nation that they loved more than life itself remains vibrant and strong
• The land of the free… because of the brave
As President Bush noted in his Memorial Day Proclamation last year: “Our Nation mourns them, and their example of strength and perseverance gives us resolve.”
Today, we are faced with the grim reality of a Global War on Terror
• A war that has claimed more than 4,500 active-duty, Reserve and Guard warriors
• A war that continues to take its toll
A price paid across our nation
• From the cities of the east coast
• To the beaches of the west
• And to every state in between
On this special day of remembrance, we think of Army Major Alan Johnson
• Who was killed by a roadside bomb in January 2007
• Born in Jamestown and raised in Montpelier, he answered his nations call to arms
• At the his memorial service, Major General David Sprynczynatyk (“sprin-suh-NAT-ick”), the North Dakota Adjutant General, said Major Johnson “lived and breathed his service to God, his family and his country”
We remember Army Staff Sergeant David Kuehl (“keel”) of Wahpeton ND,
• Who was killed by a roadside bomb in May 2007 during his second tour of duty in Iraq

And we think of Army Sergeant Travis Van Zoest (“zoost”),
• Who was killed in June 2006 while on a reconnaissance mission in Afghanistan
• His name will be added to the All Veteran’s Memorial in Bismarck later this year
However, while Memorial Day is a time of remembrance, it is not just about grief – not just about our Nation’s loss
• It is also a time for us to remind ourselves that in every generation, brave men and women willingly stand up and take the oath to serve in all branches of the military
Even more significantly, this special day serves to remind us that that price is not yet paid in full
• Liberty to always unfinished business
• And, as Thomas Jefferson wrote over two centuries ago
o The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots
It’s a high price – but our ideals and values – our freedoms – are a treasure beyond all cost

As we honor our fallen comrades this morning, Airmen, Soldiers, Sailors, and Marines stand watch around the world on freedom’s front
• Continuing the tradition of noble and faithful service to our country
As an Airman, I’m proud of what we do on a daily basis
• We fly over 300 sorties a day supporting operations in Iraq and Afghanistan
o And have flown more than a million combat and combat support sorties since September 11th
• Here at home, over 125 Airmen from Minot Air Force Base are currently deployed to the front lines, and hundreds more are preparing to deploy in the months ahead
• As we gather here today, Airmen stand alert buried deep under the North Dakota plains
o Ready to act on a moments notice and unleash nuclear fire in defense of our nation
o Deterring the unthinkable – just as they have for over 40 years

And while we stand ready to rain destruction on our enemies, we also stand ready to offer a hand to those in need – American values in action
• In just the past month, America’s Airmen have delivered 200,000 pounds of relief supplies to China in wake of their recent catastrophic earthquake
• And brought 400,000 tons of relief supplies to Burma
o Easing the incredible suffering arising in the wake of their recent devastating typhoon
Together, the men and women of our Armed Forces follow in a proud tradition -- one handed down by those that served before
On this Memorial Day, we gratefully recognize those who gave their lives to ensure our country remains free
• May we never forget those who have died for love of our great country;
• Never fail to live up to their standard of courage and conviction;
• And never falter in our resolve that the “cause for which they died shall live eternally.”
Thank you!

Bill Gates and the Cylon Conspiracy

Received this from an anonymous reader.

I applaud your bravery in revealing the identity of the Final One. Many of us have suspected for some time now, but have been afraid to reveal it--except the Linux users, but who would believe them?

How it came to pass that a cylon could be here on Earth is not important at the moment; but you all need to be warned! The process of incorporating him into our society has left the last of the Bills with no conscious memory of his true heritage (much like the Final Four in the colonial fleet). However, it did instill in him a longing for his kind, a longing he's spent his life trying to fulfill. Fortunately for us Terrans, 21st century programming is not up to the challenge.

We have found a dangerous sign. Already, Microsoft is working with automobile manufactureres to install windows in automobile computing systems. We must make the Public aware!

Just a lot of paranoid hokey? Please consider: The Hybrid:





Hybrid ships speak nonsense only they understand. Windows ™ speaks nonsense only it understands. Windows ™ is being installed in transportation vehicles. Hybrids run transportation vehicles.

Do We See the Pattern, People?

Writing Chores and a Battlestar Galactica Epiphany

I've been hard at work writing saint stories for teens for a school planner I'm writing. It's actually been a challenge because each story must:
--be 200 words
--cover that month's virtue (determined by the publisher)
--be a saint whose feast day is in that month
--be "diverse" (i.e., not too many men, too many Europeans, etc.)

Research has been the hardest part. I kept finding saints with really cool stories but not for the virtue of that month. Or I'd have to reject them because I had enough men or already had someone from Spain, or... I found eleven that fit the bill nicely, I think. Now, I'm having some teens read them to tell me if I'm "lame."

Then I spent the weekend checking Magic, Mensa and Mayhem for passive voice. Wow, does Vern use "was" a lot! Three days I spent re-writing sentences. Now I'll read it once more and send it off.

My only breaks have been watching Full Metal Alchemist, Dr. Who and Battlestar Galactica.



The Colonials and the Cylons certainly share one common trait: complete lack of foresight. ("Hey, we need to talk to the hybrid. Let's plug her in." Did anyone think to disconnect her from any vital systems like, I don't know, the JUMP drive? They probably clean their guns loaded, too. Except Athena. She just empties it into somebody first.)

Anyway, this morning, it occurred to me how the show ends. The last unknown cylon isn't in the fleet--he's already on Earth!


(Bill Gates)

It all makes sense now....

On Cats and Lolcatz

(Busy day--I'll tell you more about the conference Monday.)

I have a wonderful cat, Elbereth, patron saint of harried cats and Queen of the Fabian Household (All Hail!)

She schmoozed her way into our home 11 years ago by climbing up on Rob's chest and giving him the "happy claws" massage while purring and butting her head under his chin. Rob does not like cats. She changed his mind fast. "It's the cat that thinks its a dog! Honey, let's keep her."

I love cats. Didn't have to ask me twice.

Now, of course, she's shown her full cat side, from taking over the office chairs to peeing on the laundry when her catbox does not meet her standards. Of course, Rob's now assimilated into the mysteries of Cat. She also likes to pose next to my keyboard when I type, or if she believes she's due some homage, get between me and the keyboard.



So it's probably no surprise that we fully identify with Lolcatz. http://icanhascheezburger.com/

Lolcats are so popular, people are even translating the Bible into Lolcat. (Can you say, "too much free time?"

Today, a friend and I were talking about casting out demons and text messaging. (Yep one of those kinds of conversations) and I came up with Lolcat Exorcist

Catholic Writers' Conference Online a Hit!

Sorry this is late; I was cleaning up the chats from the Catholic Writers' Conference Online for the e-book. BTW-the e-book is for sale to anyone, so if you missed it, feel free to contact me to order a copy ($5 for PDF, $10 for CD).

What a terrific conference! Well beyond my expectations. First, we had 300 people register--half again the goal we'd set. We had two dozen presenters with about 40 workshops or chats in all covering everything from plotting out your story to working with your editor to marketing your book. Here were a few of my favorites:

Mark Shea kicked things off with a wonderful discussion on How Faith Connects Everything. I moderated this one, and it got a little out of hand from the moderating POV because opinions and ideas just flew. However, Mark summed it up this way: "It is our right and proper mission, not to spend all our time fussing about the arrangements of the sanctuary, but bringing Christ into the world. The last words of the Mass, properly translated, are "Go! You are sent" That's how I see my work as a writer."
Maya Kaathryn Bohnhoff's chats on plot and showing characterization had excellent advice and practical examples. The day after the conference, I whipped out a short story and the entire time, I kept "hearing" her remind me about what we'd learned.

"Writing with Faith and Without Bias" was another fun and practical chat. Woodeene Koenig-Bricker has a nice direct style and a fun way of putting things. "(When interviewing someone whose religious beliefs are radically different from mine) At times I've approached it as I would feeding time for the reptiles at the zoo. 'My my, that snake just ate a live rat. Well, isn't that interesting?' Not, "Oh gag, I could never eat a rat.'"

I could rave about all the chats, but let's move on to forums.

Forums didn't work as well as chats this time. I think we didn't give a good enough focus on how they could best be used, so some folks didn't know how to handle them. However, a few were excellent with a lot of participation and attendees getting some one-on-one coaching from a person experienced in the field.

I think Branding and Marketing was a big hit, especially considering that Audrey Shaffer slid into the schedule at the last minute. (Thanks, Audrey!) The Daily Devotional workshop with Patricia Punt was also very well-received. (I'm betting the DD magazines are going to love some of the submissions they receive in the coming months.)

I personally got a lot out of Michelle Buckman's The Right Details and Sylvia Dorham's Character and Dialog. I love forum workshops with writing exercises. It gives my brain a chance to twist them into my genre. (Sylvia asked us to do dialog between two characters we'd made--with them seeing a tornado. My characters were a computer hacker and his confessor for a cyberpunk story I want to write. Cyberpunk with a Tornado!" OO! And I just came up with the next scene! See why these workshops are so great?)

Then of course, there were the pitch sessions. You know how some writers conferences arrange for folks to spend 10 minutes with an editor to pitch their work? We re-created it in cyberspace! Terry Burns, agent, graciously critiqued query letters in his forum workshop and asked to see proposals on some.

Pauline Press's pitch session relied on us having two chat rooms--one where Sr. Maria Grace Dateno, Sr. Christina Wegendt and Diane Lynch would chat privately with the pitcher and one where folks hung out until it was their turn. So doesn't it figure that that was the ONE TIME the website went down, trapping us in the single chat room? While Ann made a desperate call to the host provider to get it straightened out, I opened up the chat room on the website and directed people there. People were already nervous, then to have to deal with tech errors and website hopping--plus a few had problems with the copy and paste function! One pitcher joked about resisting the urge to throw up on her keyboard. But for all that, it went amazing well, with most of the pitchers invited to send on the manuscript or proposal. Those that didn't get invited simply had books that didn't fit Pauline Books and Media's needs.

I think about 75 percent of the attendees were not used to the chat room/forum environment, and the website had such a problem with cookies that we had to wonder if it was on a diet. However, overall, the conference was a huge success and we're looking forward to doing it next year.

Thanks again to Ann Lewis for getting the website together and to Heidi Hess Saxton for recruiting such great presenters. The conference was co-sponsored by the Catholic Writers Guild and Canticle Magazine.

When Your Child Has Been Abused by Heidi Hess Saxton

Today's blog is a guest post by my friend, Heidi Hess Saxton. You might not expect to see the topic of child abuse in my blog--I usually try to be light and fun--but as a parent, this is one of my nightmares--one we've avoided, thank you, God, but one some of our friends have had to deal with. I hope this might help some of you or someone you know.

Dear Friends: This article is a topic that adoptive and foster parents need to be aware of. Because of the importance of the material, I had it reviewed by two Catholic counselors before sending it on to you. May God grant that this material help at least one struggling family, and save many lives.

When Your Child Has Been Abused
by Heidi Hess Saxton


John Paul the Great’s letter on the vocation and dignity of Catholic women, Mulieris Dignitatem, particularly for those who embrace the call to authentic femininity, is a powerful source of encouragement. It gives us a glimpse of the true splendor and beauty of each woman’s call to holy advocacy and service. In the words of the Second Vatican Council documents, “Women impregnated with the Spirit of the Gospel can do much to aid humanity in not falling.”

This popular quote has often been on my mind lately, as I have listened to the stories of adoptive mothers who are struggling to reconcile our calling to “aid … in not falling” with the task at hand: to participate in the redemption of young souls who have already been caused to fall.

Innocence Lost

Parents have a solemn responsibility to teach their children about God and His Church, and ensure that they receive at an early age all the graces available to them so that they might continue to grow up strong and mature in the faith. This challenge is hard enough for parents raising children entrusted to them from the womb. For adoptive parents, the task can be overwhelming. Genetic predispositions, pre-placement environmental influences, and emotional barriers stemming from loss and grief may not surface until years after the adoption is finalized.

Tragically, some barriers can be even more menacing and potentially destructive. In the past week I’ve encountered two different families – one black, one white – in which the children’s history of sexual abuse came up months or even years after placement in ways that nearly destroyed the entire family. In one case, an adoptive father committed suicide because he did not know how to defend himself from the baseless accusations of the three girls he and his wife had adopted. (Only later was it revealed that the children had been abused by their family of origin.)

While children don’t generally make up stories of abuse out of thin air, it is not unprecedented for a previously abused child to “turn” on a safe person out of displaced anger or spite. (This is especially common with older foster children, who use such accusations to manipulate and control the foster parents and/or social workers.) In these cases, careful documentation and close contact with a social worker or therapist is critical to safeguarding the safety of all concerned.

In the second instance I encountered, a single mother who had fostered eight children, while in the process of adopting two of them, discovered that her babysitter had violated the boys. They began acting out on other children, and ultimately were taken from the foster mother’s care. Years later, she still finds it difficult to forgive herself for not seeing it, not doing more to help them. All she could do was focus on the little children in her care that she could help.


Spotting the Abuse

Sadly, children who have been abused when they are young have scars that make them vulnerable to subsequent abuse. So sorting out the real threats from the fears is very important, and often requires the help of a trained professional. However, it is usually the parent (adoptive or foster parents included) who first see the signs that the child has unresolved trauma. Signs include:

• Child acts out in ways that are sexually suggestive or physically aggressive,
• Child has persistent nightmares or bedwetting (age 5+),
• Child touches self or others inappropriately and/or compulsively,
• Child is suddenly fearful or overly compliant around another adult (80 percent of molested children know their abusers – family friends, teachers, extended family members, etc.)
• Child is suddenly fearful of changing clothes or venturing outside home (to school or babysitter’s)
• Child draws disturbing images (or reenacts these stories with dolls),
• (In teenagers), child suddenly loses interest in her appearance, and/or alienates him or herself from friends and family.
• Additional information may be found here: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/child_abuse_physical_emotional_sexual_neglect.htm

As adoptive parents – particularly parents of older adoptees with a vague history of neglect and/or abuse – we must steel ourselves for the possibility that the time may come when we are asked to participate in the painful process of redemption for our children. We may find ourselves having to re-direct our children again and again, and get for them (and ourselves) the help needed to resolve and receive healing for the violations they received before they came to us (or even, God forbid, at the hands of a third party while under our care). These wounds go deep, and leave a scar that may make them unwitting targets for subsequent abuse.

What should you do if you suspect your child has been abused?

First, pray and seek counsel so you can think clearly and react calmly. It is crucial that you can be spiritually strong for the child. You are being called to model authentic love for a child who has suffered at the hands of the counterfeit. While you are getting help for your child, go to daily Mass if you can; pray the Rosary and have others do the same on your behalf (though be careful to protect the child’s privacy as much as possible when you make your request known).

Assure your child that you love him or her, and that you are going to help him or her. Nothing he tells you will make you angry with him, or make you love her less. Be careful not to react with anger or disgust if you witness an “acting out” episode – see it for the cry of help that it is. For your own safety and that of your child, carefully document in writing how, when, and where you encounter signs of abuse.

Second, consider the safety of the other children in the family. Children who have experienced sexual abuse frequently abuse younger children. You may need to install door alarms or other safety devices, and take other safety precautions (such as not bathing the children together or allowing them to be left alone in a room together). Children can and do heal from all kinds of abuse … However, such healing does not occur overnight. It may be necessary to have the child placed temporarily or even permanently in a home where no other children are present, for his own good and for the safety of the other children in the home.

Third, get professional help for the child. As a parent, you must find the truth and get your child the help he or she needs – the sooner the better. Catholic therapists who specialize in sexual abuse may be found at http://www.catholictherapists.com. If no qualified Catholic counselors are in your area, Pastoral Solutions (http://www.exceptionalmarriages.com/services.htm) offers telecounseling.

Fourth, protect the child’s privacy as much as possible without endangering others. If you have a social worker, consult with him or her about what you have observed and get his or her recommendations for next steps. Again, be sure to make careful records of when, where, and what you have observed. This information is too crucial to entrust to memory.

If your child has been “acting out” with other children in the home, make an appointment with the school counselor and/or teacher to discuss the importance of supervising children closely, especially in the bathroom and on the playground. By acknowledging that you are aware that your child has a history of abuse, you safeguard your own child’s well-being as well as that of other children.

If you suspect your child is being abused by a third party, it is absolutely critical that you trust your gut and do whatever is necessary to keep your child safe. If another child is the source of the problem, alert that child’s parents; if the children must continue to have contact with each other (such as siblings), they must be monitored continuously and closely. If you suspect your child is being abused outside the home, changing babysitters or even schools is a small price to pay for peace of mind. Once the child is safe, you may then need to file a formal report with Child Protective Services (CPS), for the sake of other children.

Suzanne Baars adds: “Eighteen states require by law that one must report suspected child abuse. Once a child is in counseling and this information is shared with the counselor, either the counselor or the parent will be required to report the matter to Child Protective Services.” Adult perpetrators will be required to leave the home – or the children will be placed in protective custody. When the perpetrator is a child, that child may need to be placed temporarily or even permanently in a home where there are no other children present.

Fifth, do not waste time in self-blame or self-doubt. You love your children, and want them to grow up to be strong, healthy Christians. You may have ambivalent feelings about what has happened – questioning whether you could have said or done anything to prevent the abuse. You may be angry with yourself for having unwittingly endangered your child, for having put him in this school or her in that daycare situation. You may be harboring hateful or even murderous thoughts about the individuals who did these things to your children, wanting more than anything for them to experience the full consequences of their actions. This is normal … but it is also harmful to hold on to these feelings.

Talk with your priest in the sacrament of reconciliation; seek out a professional counselor who can help you work through these issues so that you might be able to forgive yourself and (ultimately) the perpetrator. It is important to release yourself of that burden, so you can be free to help your children. God has entrusted a special cross to you; He is asking you to help your child find healing, and to model forgiveness. Not for the sake of the abuser, but so that those who are touched by the abuse might find peace. God bless you!

Heidi would like to acknowledge the valuable assistance of Suzanne Baars and Dr. Gregory Popcak, who both reviewed this article prior to publication. Suzanne was especially helpful in describing the legal responsibilities of one who suspects abuse has occurred. You may contact Suzanne through “In His Image Christian Counseling Services” (http://www.conradbaars.com/SueBaarsBio.htm).

Copyright 2008 Heidi Hess Saxton. Used with permission. For permission to reprint, contact the author through her website:
http://www.christianword.com.

Conferences, Politics and Firefly

Sorry I'm late--the conference was busy and a blast yesterday. Today, I'm running the Catholic Writers Conference Online website solo because my best friend, co-coordinator and webmistress extraordinairre, Ann Lewis, is manning the polls in her area. (help me....)

So, I thought it was only appropriate to tell you today about my favorite Non-Candidate, Gray Rinehart:

Meet the anti-candidate: we're not on the ballot for President, Senator, Governor, Representative, County Council, City Council, School Board, or any elected office (so far as we know). You won't see our name on those irritating little signs in your neighborhood. You won't see any obnoxious "I approved this message" ads on television. In fact, if you're committed to one party or one issue and you find a candidate who will represent you adequately, we encourage you to vote for that person.

Then again, if you find you're not satisfied with the candidates already on the ballot -- and you can't pick one to vote against, as Robert A. Heinlein suggested -- just vote against all the candidates and write in "Gray Rinehart." It doesn't matter what office: put us down for any or all of them. (Be sure to spell the name right; we wouldn't want the election officials to get confused.) On the off chance that we win, we probably won't show up anyway, since we agree with Thomas Jefferson: "That government governs best which governs least."

Read More.

On his forum, he also has a thread for discussion of his political views. Some serious, some fun, but he forgot one:
T
he vital issue of Science Fiction.

Let's take just one point: the return of Firefly. I can understand McCain not addressing this--though he'd love the guns and horses, his staff would have to work him into the idea of science fiction as a whole.

But Obama? He's a democrat--how can he not be aware of a television show? Oh, that's right. It was on Fox.

Hilary, I think hinted at it with her campaign ad: It's 3 AM and the terrorists strike. Who do you want in the White House? The answer is obvious:

Malcolm Reynolds.

Review of My Own Kind of Freedom: a Firefly Novel by Steven Brust

I adore the FOX SF series Firefly. I found it refreshing and unique in its approach and voice. Where Gene Roddenberry tried to make "wagon train in space," and came up with something special but different, Joss Wheadon truly hit the mark with "the Wild West in space" with all its raw energy, unsanitized morality and excellent combination of genres. It quickly gained critical acclaim and an incredibly faithful fan base.

Sadly, FOX didn't see things the way reviewers and fans did, and they canceled the series after 13 short episodes. Of course, as with any good show, you can't totally kill it, and Firefly lives on in fanfict.

Thus comes Steven Brust's novel, My Own Kind of Freedom. Even the title is distinctively Firefly--and he lives up to the expectations it sets.
The crew of Serenity actually has a legal mission for once--delivering a load of lumber to a rich landowner on Hera names Sakaya. The planet, home of Serenity Ridge, where Mal and Zoe fought the fateful battle where the Browncoats at last lost the war, brings back unwelcome memories, but all they have to do is unload, get paid, buy a grav boot and go. Of course, nothing is easy for this crew.

Jayne gets caught stealing from one of their contacts and leaves the crew in a huff after refusing to return the merchandise. Naturally, his next step is to contact the Alliance and arrange to sell out River and Simon Tam. However, doing so interrupts a major sting operation the Alliance had planned on Sakaya, as the agent has to drop his work to meet Jayne. This suspicious behavior tips off Sakaya, who sends out hit men. Mal and Zoe immediately catch on to the hit men's intentions and step in. Too bad they didn't know the intended victim was an Alliance agent before they thwarted their plan. But when Kaylee sees the terrible condition of the people under Sakaya's thumb and Jayne gets arrested for drunk and disorderly and instead of bail gets indentured servitude as punishment, Mal and the crew find themselves helping the Alliance to bring Sakaya down. And if that weren't enough trouble, it turns out Sakaya is actually the Colonel who mentored Mal in his military career, pitting Mal's old loyalties against his own kind of morality.

All the fun you loved in Firefly, you'll find in My Own Kind of Freedom. The ironic humor, the general banter, the crazy antics, even the mix of Chinese and English--it's all there.

Steven has the characterization and dialog dead-to-rights. My favorites were Walsh and River. Not only did he get River's disjointed but perfectly sensical monologs correct, but he came up with very believable thought-processes to go with it. When you're dealing with a psychic driven insane by brain manipulation as well as the horrible secrets in her beyond-brilliant mind, that's an accomplishment. Walsh has his own unique brilliance and way of communicating, and Steven caught this too: an entire page of Walsh's thoughts as he flew Serenity into the planet's atmosphere, about the difficulty, the challenge, the glory, the complete lack of appreciation by the rest of the crew. Yet when Mal asks how entry went? "It's an entry. They're all the same."

Steven fills it with the same great action and humorous situations fans loved with Firefly--from Jayne's jail cell fiasco to Zoe breaking orders to follow Mal back planetside while everyone else on Serenity breaks orders to follow her to River learning to fly the shuttle after reading the manual for 45 minutes. (It took that long because there were mistakes.) In addition, he had great touches with memories of the Mal's relationship with Sakaya (Then Colonel Bursa), Jayne's clueless inner dialogue, even the chapter titles: My Own Kind of Past, My Own Kind of Clever. Yes, Steven's certain applied his own kind of clever to my favorite show.

Hope he has more missions in mind for the crew of Serenity.

Download it for Free!
http://dreamcafe.com/firefly.html

First Communions and Situational Awareness

I'm thrilled to announce that my youngest son, Liam, received his First Holy Communion yesterday! There were only 10 in his class (our base parish is small), but they were all so beautiful and excited, and the parish made a really big celebration of it. We used my dad's fancy camera for pics, so I'll post one when he e-mails them to me.

I'm incredibly busy trying to finalize stuff for the Catholic Writers Conference Online, plus Rob gets to TDY to Wyoming this week. He gets back Thursday then Friday, I'm off to my goddaughter's First Communion! All these happy souls receiving God's grace!

Well, I don't know about you, but I'm finding that the busier I am, the harder it is to keep up on details. Check out your situational awareness with this video:

Catholic Writers Conference Online Registration Ends Friday

Just a reminder that the Catholic Writers Conference Online registration ends FRIDAY! This is a free conference, with speakers from all areas of Catholic publishing--from the writer to the publisher--covering all areas of writing--from idea generation to query to contract and beyond. Sign up at http://conference.catholicwritersguild.org.

Here's a list of presenters and their presentations.

Ami McConnell: Trends In Fiction
Audrey Shaffer: Branding and Your Marketing Platform
Barry Michaels: Feature Article--Ideas and Queries
Bert Ghezzi: Ins and Outs of Publishing
Brian St Paul--Crisis & InsiderCatholic: Meet the Editors of InsiderCatholic
Carolyn Howard-Johnson: 10 Ways to Let Agents Know You are an Amateur
Carolyn Howard-Johnson: Marketing Basics (with Karina)
Colleen Drippe: Driving Writers Crazy--The Editor
Heidi Hess Saxton: The Good Writer
Heidi Hess Saxton: Meet the Editor of Canticle Magazine
Hope Clark: Shy Writer
Hope Clark: Funds for Writers
Karina Fabian: Worldbuilding
Karina Fabian: Marketing Basics (with Carolyn)
Karina Fabian: Virtual Book Tours
Karina, Michelle Buckman, Terry Burns: Contract Essentials
Lea Schizas: Writing the Short Story
Mark Shea: How Faith Connects to Everything
Maya Bohnhoff: Show Me, Don't Tell Me--Character and Dialog
Maya Bohnhoff: Plotting Through Writer's Block
Melenie Rigney: Ethics of Memoir Writing
Melenie Rigney: Book Modeling
Meredith Gould: Self-Publishing as a First Resort
Michelle Buckman: Writing For Teens
Michelle Buckman: The Right Details
Patrice MacArthur: Art of Blogging
Patricia Punt: Writing for the Inspirational Market
Patti Armstrong--Ascension Press: Hooking Your Reader
Pete Vere: Canon Law and the Catholic Writer
Sister Maria Grace-Pauline Books: Pitch Session--Pauline Books
Steve Saffel: Working With a Book Editor
Steve Saffel: Using E-Media to Promote
Sylvia Dohram: Character Development and Dialogue
Terry Burns--agent: Pitching and Working With Agents
Tim Drake: So You Want to Write a Book?
Tim Powers: SFF and Catholicism
Tom Grace: Crafting the Catholic Thriller
Vinita Wright: Making Friends With the Creative/Spiritual Process
Woodenee Koenig Bricker: Writing With Faith But Without Bias

Designing the Imperfect Dragon's Lair, Part II

Sorry for the delay, but Thursday was crazy! Now, to Vern's house:

Minot restaurant Supply gave me my basic template and feel, and showed me how things fit. There were some things I wanted different, however, so I played with graph paper until I got the look I want.

One hard part was trying to fit the lair with the stories I've already written. In the story before Grace showed up, Vern had a long, echoing walk to where he saw clients. After Grace, they had a crowded little office. With Grace also came a kitchen, bedroom on a second level and a magical workshop. That meant moving things around, building some walls, adding a few appliances... Grace also needed a shower. (Vern could bathe in a lake when the mood suited. Dragons don't get especially dirty.) I also wanted some hidden areas and piles and boxes of miscellaneous junk that Vern's never really gotten around to cataloging. ("It's as close to treasure as I've had in 800 years. Why wreck the illusion?")

So I added a second cold warehouse in the back with a double-door, and shrunk the side "cold warehouse" some. The effect is an "evil Tetris piece" the kind that will never fit no matter how you turn it. This gives me a corner spot in the far end where the main warehouse walls do not touch the cold warehouses--these form two walls of Grace's workshop. (I'm still deciding if I want stained glass windows or not.)
Inside the heated warehouse, the walls are lined with a handmade second level that runs 6 or 8 feet wide. It's broken in spots for the doors, toilets and workshop. Catty-corner to the workshop is her bedroom on the second floor--just big enough for a bed, wardrobe and chest, with a place outside the room itself for her harp, a chair and music stand. Below her is Vern's new sleeping spot.

The store area--a 21 x 10 foot area in front of the heated warehouse--is their public area. It's divided between an office and kitchen with a hallway in between.
Now the backstory for the set-up:

The building was originally a warehouse for making toilets. (Sorry, that's too good to pass up!) Over the years, it was sold to a plumbing supply store, a machine parts factory, and a lumberyard. Each left stuff behind, and it just got pushed into the corner. Finally, it was bought during the Los Lagos recession (pre-Gap, when even Wal-Mart wouldn't station itself there) by a single internet entrepreneur. He was an aging bachelor, running a fairly successful e-Bay business from it, but in his last years he developed Alzheimer's. He'd mis-catalog things, buy weird items without any plans for selling them, and generally let things get into disarray. Fortunately, he did not drive himself into debt, though he didn't have much profit. The building and everything in it was given to the Little Flowers parish (where Vern was staying) by the owner after he died of a heart attack. The parish agreed to sell the property and contents to Vern.

Vern doesn't really need much, so for a long time, the junk just got shoved aside, leaving him with a long empty stretch from door to his bed and desk. (He liked the effect.) Sometimes, the parish would hold a yard sale or they would need something and they'd delve into the inventory to see if Vern had it. But, frankly, the whole place was chaos and no one in the parish really wanted to devote much time to it.
When Grace came, that changed, however. She needed to be able to cook her meals, take a shower, sleep, and--of course--work magic.

Once again, things were shuffled and moved. Parts of the second level were torn down and the wood used to build a bedroom, shower and kitchen. Fortunately, one of the previous owners had set up a snack bar area with a fridge, sink and even a small oven. The inventory was read again and, by magic or miracles, things they needed kept popping up--dishes and elbow pipes, even an old door and modular furniture walls. Other stuff, they got at Goodwill. Some of Grace's sisters came across the Gap to help, as did some members of the parish and even a few people from the neighborhood who had befriended Vern. While the public area is more homey and the heated warehouse much clearer and cleaner, It's still chaos in the cold warehouses and along the walls. Every now and then, Grace takes a whack at restoring order, but Vern's not very cooperative. "Leave my junk alone!"

One day, I'm going to write a story about something they find in their warehouse.

No time to blog--funny link instead (Meat-Flavored Water)

Crazy day with appointments and cleaning house before a hosting an event here, so I'll blog more about Vern's house Monday. However, here's a link to keep you amused. I really hope this is not the latest health drink, but you never know with Atkins: Meat-Flavored Water.

Designing the Imprefect Dragon's Lair

One thing I'm not, is a good visualizer. I can envision limited glimpses of a place in my mind, but things like an overall floor plan tend to baffle me. For this reason, I've thus far cheated on my descriptions of the home of my dragon detective, Vern.

I have a vision of a run-down, built-for-function-not-beauty warehouse with a six-foot chain-link fence around it. There's a fenced dog run near the double-gate, lousy grass (dragons aren't gardeners), and cracked pavement leading to the warehouse.

From there, I draw a blank as far as the overall scheme. I've had a vision of a large long echoing walk to where Vern resides, an incredible crowding of boxes and junk, a second floor with a small room for Grace, an isolated workshop, and a small office in the front area with a closet and a window facing the yard. And a kitchen needed to be there somewhere.

Some days, it embarrasses me that I teach worldbuilding at conventions. Those who can't, teach, right?

Well, moving to Minot has been wonderful for building Vern's world. Small town, railroad, not particularly glamorous and not interested in being so, It's just like pre-gap Los Lagos. And there are warehouses everywhere! Big, little, steel, brick, curved roofed like an aircraft hangar--you name it, you'll find it in Minot.
Could I find Vern's home?

For months, I've been daydreaming as I drive. That one's too new; that one's too big; that one's too filmsy. Where was my dream lair?

Last Monday, I found it in the Minot Restaurant Supply Store on Burbank. When I walked in and told the owner I was an author, he immediately asked if I needed a portly, almost 60 man with a balding head. I promised to write him in, but either way, he was only too glad to take me around his warehouse, answer my questions, tell me its history and let me make sketches.

Built in the 1950s as a toilet manufacturing warehouse, the front half is whitewashed stucco; the back half, old brick. Inside, the store proper is about a 20 x 40 (guessing here) area with two small offices made with 70s paneling and 2 x 4s behind a long counter. The merchandise--and they had some cooooool stuff--was all on metal shelves or on the wall. A large set of wooden double-doors led to the warehouse in the back.

There are actually two warehouses: heated and cold. The heated one was full of metal shelves holding a variety of stuff, but what drew my attention was the second level--again done with paneling and 2 x 4s; sturdy but cheap and just what I wanted. The bathrooms were just inside the doors, Men and Women, and looked like they'd been tossed up sometime after the original construction. The cold room was similar, just...well, colder.

The ceiling was corrugated steel braces with railings that hung down about 2 feet. The ceiling itself is only 14 feet, and he said many a young worker has smacked his head while working on the upper level.

I loved it. It's not quite perfect for Vern's house, because my piecemeal vision has led to several stories mentioning things that Minot Restaurant Supply's building doesn’t have, but the overall feel was just what I wanted.

Want to know what I ended up with? Read it from Vern's side, or check out this blog Thursday.

Expelled: Movie about Darvinism Overpowering Creation in Schools

I remember arguing with my geometry teacher about creation vs. evolution. Interestingly, he'd made a comment about evolution being wrong and creation was Truth, and I had asked why we couldn't have both? He got very uncomfortable and changed the subject.

Now, there's a new movie coming out about how teachers and scientists are being ostracized by their peers for even suggesting that maybe evolution isn't the key to our world, but that there might be something to this idea of "creation." Check it out here: http://www.expelledthemovie.com/playground.php

As a Catholic, I believe that the Bible was written for the purpose of saving our souls and telling us how to live our lives, and not as a scientific text, so I can't subscribe to Biblical Creationism. After all, Genesis was written by scientifically primitive men (possible Moses himself) for scientifically primitive men. It's not like God could say, "In the beginning, I (complex problem in physics involving quantum mechanics and unification theory) and created light." Even if he gave Moses the divine ability to understand that--which puts him ahead of our current scientists--what's Moses going to tell the people? "God said, 'Let there be light. And there was.'"

QED

What's more important is that God did create everything, that He did it in an orderly fashion, and that It Was Good. Whether his day is 24 hours or if (like in the movie O God), when God had breakfast, Hitler was overrunning Poland, is not important to me. And whether or not he used evolution, fiat-creation, or something in between doesn't matter to me. In fact, I think evolution is a fine model for helping us understand the biological world, even though it is imperfect and needs to be explored, debated, tweaked or simply tossed out in favor of something better. Regardless, it does not have to exclude a loving God.

And, of course, that's where my beef is. Evolution is a theory, but it's being treated like something factual and sure as the Law of Gravity. What's more, those who dare speak against it on religious (or frankly, academic) grounds are persecuted for blaspheming against the 'science' of evolution.

Blaspheming. There's a good word.

Seems to me, God mentioned something about that, too. Something about having no other Gods before him?

Ideas can be worshiped, too.

Amazon's New Marketing Fiasco

The latest buzz in the publishing world is Amazon.com's new ploy to insist that all publishers who use Print-On-Demand (POD) technology use their BookSurge POD printer if they want to sell their books on amazon.com. Already several titles, while still showing on their website, have lost the "buy now" button.

POD does not mean vanity publishing or self-publishing, although this is the printing choice most vanity and self-publishers take. However, a lot of small press, traditional publishers use this technology in order to spare themselves warehouse expenses. Also, I believe some of the bigger publishing houses use it for their less popular but still selling titles. This move by Amazon has big consequences.

For Amazon, it makes financial sense--if everyone goes along with it. They now get paid for printing the books as well as selling them. However, as you'll see below, a lot of small press publishers are not going to give in to Amazon's "blackmail."

For small publishers, it's a problem. It's not just the principal of the thing, as I understand it; "retooling" their old titles to match BookSurge's needs and meeting BookSurge's prices is cost-prohibitive for a lot of publishers. They may end up going on their own or going out of business.

For authors like me, it could affect sales. Two of the three fiction publishers I contract with use POD; if Amazon goes through with its plans, my books will not be available for sales on Amazon, which of course is the most common sales venue outside of brick-and-mortar stores. Amazon already demands a big discount in order to have your book on their website, and that eats into royalties; now, they want an even bigger cut.

For readers, it means that if you like unusual books--the kind that don't grace the shelves of B&N--you're going to have a harder time finding them, at least until some other company rises to take Amazon's place. Ditto if you like shopping on-line.

As you can read below, small press publishers are taking action. What can you do? Write to amazon.com and express your displeasure at their new policy.

In the meantime, here's what publishers are doing:

(This from the Authors Guild, forwarded to me from another writing group.)

Last week Amazon announced that it would be requiring that all books
that it sells that are produced through on-demand means be printed by
BookSurge, their in-house on-demand printer/publisher. Amazon pitched
this as a customer service matter, a means for more speedily
delivering print-on-demand books and allowing for the bundling of
shipments with other items purchased at the same time from Amazon. It
also put a bit of an environmental spin on the move -- claiming less
transportation fuel is used (this is unlikely, but that's another
story) when all items are shipped directly from Amazon.

We, and many others, think something else is afoot. Ingram Industries'
Lightning Source is currently the dominant printer for on-demand
titles, and they appear to be quite efficient at their task. They ship
on-demand titles shortly after they are ordered through Amazon
directly to the customer. It's a nice business for Ingram, since they
get a percentage of the sales and a printing fee for every on-demand
book they ship. Amazon would be foolish not to covet that business.

What's the rub? Once Amazon owns the supply chain, it has effective
control of much of the "long tail" of publishing -- the enormous
number of titles that sell in low volumes but which, in aggregate,
make a lot of money for the aggregator. Since Amazon has a firm grip
on the retailing of these books (it's uneconomic for physical book
stores to stock many of these titles), owning the supply chain would
allow it to easily increase its profit margins on these books: it need
only insist on buying at a deeper discount -- or it can choose to
charge more for its printing of the books -- to increase its profits.
Most publishers could do little but grumble and comply.

We suspect this maneuver by Amazon is far more about profit margin
than it is about customer service or fossil fuels. The potential big
losers (other than Ingram) if Amazon does impose greater discounts on
the industry, are authors -- since many are paid for on-demand sales
based on the publisher's gross revenues -- and publishers.

We're reviewing the antitrust and other legal implications of Amazon's
bold move. If you have any information on this matter that you think
could be helpful to us, please call us at (212) 563-5904 and ask for
the legal services department, or send an e-mail to
staff@authorsguild.org.

Feel free to post or forward this message in its entirety.

-----------------------

Copyright 2008, The Authors Guild. The Authors Guild
(www.authorsguild.org) is the nation's largest society of published
book authors.

Men and the "Nothing Box"

The most boring date of my life was when my date took me to an arcade and I spent two excruciating hours watching him play video games. I definitely gave him the "let's be friends" speech after that, and frankly, I didn't even care that much.

So how is it I married an on-line gamer?

Rob's latest thrill of choice is Lord of the Rings Online. He loves the graphics and the story line, the endless hours of bashing spiders while yelling, "Baruk! Hadda! Idaryu!" Or rather, watching his dwarf bard bash things.

Recently, his high-powered gaming computer went on the fritz, so he's having to make do with his laptop. Since it's just not up to standard, she spends a lot of time crafting instead of fighting.

Yes, crafting. Rob pushes buttons; he watches as his dwarf runs for 10 minutes across the countryside (unless he gets it a horse, then he watches the backside of a pony for 10 minutes as it carried his dwarf across the countryside.) The dwarf gets to town, where it picks up it's mail--stuff his buddies send him to craft with. Then he pushes more buttons and his dwarf runs to a temple or craft house or something--they look alike to me. then he pushes more buttons and sits, mesmerized, while his dwarf swings a hammer for no apparent reason since he's working with gemstones. this continues until the computer has decided he's had enough and declares he's "made" something.

I don't get it.

The other day, however, my friend Ann found a video that explained it all: Men and the "Nothing Box."



One of the things I love most about Rob is his incredible mind. Whether at work or writing, teasing the kids or coming up with a killer pun, he's got this incredible knack for managing details and making them fit in the big picture. If the "nothing box" is the price to pay, then I guess I can live with that.

Just don't take me to the arcade.

Past Predictions for the Future

I've got the flu, the worst case I can remember. I've been mostly off-line, barely keeping up with my groups and such and putting off anything that requires a decision or real thought. I'm just not up to it. On the bright side, I can only sleep so much, so I've been taking the opportunity to rip apart an old manuscript and give it some much-needed editing. This poor thing has been through three major re-writes. At some point, it will be sterling. Maybe then, my agent in shining armor will come.

In the meantime, however, I was contemplating how you'd have thought be now we could cure the common cold, or (for my sake) the flu. Yeah, there are vaccines, but each year, we need to make a new batch based on predictions of how the virus is changing. See article. The problem is that nature adapts, sometimes faster than technology can or humans will.

Plus, there are times when we simply predict wrong. Was it this year or last that the CDC predicted the wrong strains of flu?

Of course, flu bugs aren't the only thing we aren't always good at predicting. Take a look at these 1900 predictions for the 21st century. I've been reading some of Rob's old SF books and while they take moon bases and hovercars for granted, they seemed to have missed cell phones and computer animation. In fact, we're better at prediction bugs than we are ourselves.

Wish I could have predicted this flu hitting me this hard. Not sure what else I'd have done, but lacking a high-tech solution, I think I'll have a nice low-tech orange.

Twins Save Moms Life While In Womb

I've finally succumbed to the flu that's been plaguing the family, so you're spared a diatribe from me. However, Rob came across this article that I wanted to share. I know it was a one-in-a-million chance, yet, I find it a beautiful ending for a woman who was willing to put the lives of her unborn children over her own.

Twins Save Mom's Life, Kick Loose Deadly Tumor From Mom's Cervix While Still in Womb

Hope everyone had a blessed Easter!

Spoiled Kids

As a mom of a teenagers, one of my biggest challenges is to convince the kids that they have no real reason to be dissatisfied with their lot. Every time one of them starts with the "I'm depressed" or "Life stinks," I'm right there to disagree. Whether the serious lecture, the sarcastic speech or the rhetorical questions, the points don't change:

1. You have parents in a happy, loving, committed relationship.
2. They love you and do their best for you, listen to you and play with your more than their parents did. (Sorry Mom and Dad, but it's true.)
3. You have siblings who, even with the standard arguments get along with you better than a lot of siblings we know.
4. You have a roof over your head, so much food you can afford to not clean your plate, desert and junk food far too often.
5. You have a good school with teachers that care and kids that, even when snobby, are kinder than many we grew up around.
6. You have computer games, MP3 players, TV and all forms of entertainment in addition to a plethora of other board games, crafts, science kits....
7. Your dad's in a stable job that brings in a good paycheck and gets him home to us, even if not always at a reasonable hour.

It seems to me that the more people have, the easier it is to feel dissatisfied. Now, I've read I'm not the only one to see that. A Generation Tries to Imagine Life Without iPods.

I love the last line in the article:

After my lecture, one young woman walked up to me on her way out and huffed: "What I favor is a radical redistribution of wealth in America." I tried to tell her that America's greatness is a result of our focus on creating wealth, not redistributing it. But it was too late -- she was already tuning in to her iPod.

If it had been me, I would have told her, "OK. empty your wallet and give me your cellphone and iPod so I can hock them and get the money to people in real need." I'll even go one further and find someone who actually believes, despite their impoverished situation, that they are blessed to be alive in this century and this country.

Some fun looks at religion

Been having some interesting conversations about religion lately--from a deep discussion on the Catholic perspective of Heaven and Hell and who goes where (Short answer: Not up to us to say. We're here to put out the rules.) to a rather silly but heated discussion on whether extra-terrestrials can become nuns.

I'll talk more about the nuns issue later. Today, I'm up to my ears in work for the upcoming Catholic Writers Conference Online! (Sign up now! It'll be great!) So I'd like to leave you with two funnies based on the Bible:

The Gnostic writings of the Gospel for Cat Owners: http://wittenburgdoor.com/comment/reply/328

The Bible in Klingonese Project: http://www.klingonword.org/

LOTR Comic parody

A few posts ago, I blogged about how my family is enjoying read-aloud theater with a Star Wars parody being done as an internet comic. Thought folks might like to know that the same person has done a similar one with Lord of the Rings. I'd call this one PG-13, because there's a lot of talk of brothels, but you're sure to laugh as the gamers run rings around Tolkien's masterpiece.

Catholic Writers Conference Online Update

The Catholic Writers Conference Online will be held May 2-9, 2008 at
www.conference.catholicwritersguild.org. It's totally free and totally on-line--bring your own conference food!

So far, we have nearly two dozen presentations in chat or forum format. Workshops, lectures and even pitch sessions cover all topics of interest to Catholic writers from query letters to the publishing process, practical tips and theological implications of writing as a Catholic. Here's the line-up so far:

Bert Ghezzi Ins and Outs of Publishing
Carolyn Howard-Johnson 10 ways to let agents know you're an amateur
Carolyn Howard-Johnson Marketing Basics (with Karina Fabian)
Colleen Drippe Driving Writers Crazy--The Editor
Donna-Marie Cooper O'Boyle Keyword-Balance: writing and household
Heidi Hess Saxton The Good Writer
Hope Clark Shy Writer
Hope Clark Funds for Writers
Karina Fabian Worldbuilding
Karina Fabian Virtual Book Tours
Lea Schizas Writing the Short Story
Mark Shea How Faith Connects to Everything
Maya Bohnhoff Show Me, Don't Tell Me--characters and dialog
Maya Bohnhoff Plotting Through Writer's Gap
Melenie Rigney Ethics of Memoir Writing
Melenie Rigney Book Modeling
Meredith Gould Self-Publishing as a First Resort
Patrice MacArthur Art of Blogging
Patricia Punt Writing for the Inspirational Market
Sylvia Dohram Character Development and Dialogue
Terry Burns Pitching and Working With Agents
Tim Drake So You Want to Write a Book?
Tim Powers SFF and Catholicism
Vinita Wright Making Friends With the Creative/Spiritual Process

We have other presenters as well as publishers and editors who will hear your pitches.

What we need now are attendees. If you're a Catholic writer, this is the conference to attend--and you don't even have to leave home! Go to www.conference.catholicwritersguild.org and sign up today!

ISIG II and Tech Toys

First, I'd like to let all the SF writers out there know that we've extended the submissions period for Infinite Space, Infinite God II to June 30. You can read the full guidelines at www.isigsf.com/guidelines. In short, however:

Make it Science Fiction
Make it Catholic
Make it Good!
'Nuff said!

Not all sci-fi is tech toys and not all tech toys are science fiction. In fact, there are several sci-fi concepts that we could do today...if we wanted to fork out the dough. Check out this article in Wired Magazine. Of course, we're a little disappointed that the article failed to address that Bigelow Aerospace is already working on an orbital hotel.

Darths, Droids, and Readers' Theater

When I was growing up, I had a couple of Star Wars posters in my room. I'd doctored them up with jokes and the characters saying silly things. Whenever I felt sad, I would look at those posters and laugh. They stayed up for years until we moved.

In January, a friend introduced me to a kindred spirit: the writer of Darths and Droids. Here's someone with too much humor to keep to himself and probably too much time on his hands, but I'm glad he's spending it on this and sharing it with the world.

As I was howling at some of the one-liners, I realized the rest of my family would love it. We'd recently set up our new TV to take input from the internet--Rob's Christmas present--so one evening, we pulled it up on the big screen. Everyone took a part and we had a reader's theater.

We laughed for about 2 hours--56 pages worth. Liam, our youngest and until this year a VERY reluctant reader, took some of the harder parts. We had to help him with some of the words, but he loved it and was mad when we came to the end. We'd have to caution our oldest from scanning instead of reading the words, but some of his snafus were as funny as the cartoon.

We've been holding off until we had a chunk of entries to read. Tonight's the night. I can hardly wait.

Open Disclosure

This week, I found myself in a moral dilemma.

I have a book tour blog, Virtual Book Tour de Net, where I post blurbs, interviews, trailers and the occasional review. My guidelines say that as long as it's not hate-promoting or erotica, I'm glad to post it. And for the most part I am. People have different tastes and biases and I respect that. I've come to the attention of a couple of great book-promotion companies, who ask me to tour their clients. I'm honored to this for them, and have found they're terrific people to work with.

One of those is Pump Up Your Book Promotion. They're a full service online book promotions firm. They've sent me some fun titles. This month, I toured for them Marvin Zimmerman's The Ovum Factor--and eco-thriller. I went to their site to get the information, and saw he had a trailer, so I checked it out. About a fourth of the way in, an obviously Catholic bishop or cardinal says, "Scientific research is the ultimate threat to God's creation."

Those of you who know me will understand why I stopped right there, why I will never buy this book and why I'm blogging this now.

For those that don't: I write Catholic sci-fi. My husband, Rob's, and my first book, Infinite Space, Infinite God is a rebuttal to this whole Church vs. Science cliché that is not only wrong but stupid and reflecting a narrow-minded albeit popular bias--as anyone who does a few minutes of research into the history of the Church will discover. (No, I don't feel strongly on this subject. Why do you ask?)

I thought about not promoting his book on my site. However, I said myself that as long as it's not hate-mongering or erotica, I'm glad to post it. I don't believe his book is doing either. I'm more inclined to think that he's jumped on the DaVinci Code trendy bandwagon by using the Catholic Church as a conspirator than that he has some particular bias against the Church or religion. And, at least according to his trailer, they are part of a broader group of "conservative forces" out to stop his hero. Nonetheless, it does not matter.

I have no intention of reading Zimmerman's book. I don't want to contribute to his royalties. Regardless of what his book says, if he's content to let his trailer broadcast this message, it's enough to stop me.

I'm posting this along with a link to my site and the Zimmerman's page on Pump Up Your Book Promotion which has the video along with a synopsis. If eco-thrillers are your thing, go look and make up your own mind before you buy.

I don't want to make a big deal of this, but I felt I needed to make it clear where I stand.

King Kluck and Questinos

The Saga of King Kluck is now on video! Ever thought of mummifying a chicken? Great educational project? Along with all the needed materials, get yourself a clothespin for your nose. Learn more here, and feel free to laugh as you do. I did.

This was a homeschooling project my younger sons and I did a couple of years ago. it was actually kind of fun, and the laugh value was priceless. I've blogged about it before and wrote an article about it for Home Education Magazine. Use the search function to look up the blogs.

Now a new word for authors:

Questinos: What you get when you break a query down to its base elements.

Have a great, laugh-filled week.

'S No boarding for me again!

The kids have been asking us for a couple of years to take them snowboarding.

I've got to tell you, this is not something I get excited about. I can do fairly well on skis--or could do, it's been decades since I last trusted my life to a couple of strips of wood. However, I did compromise in Virginia--when Walmart had a sale, I bought some El Cheapo boards the kids could take down the driveway. That worked well.

However, now that we were in North Dakota, land of snow, we were stuck--I mean, committed--to taking them to a real slope.

Rob had it planned for months. We'd go on President's day, which was after the inspection and his trip to New Mexico. He called me from 70 degree weather to remind me to rent the snowboards from the base rec center. I went out in 7 degrees--not once, but 3 times--to get the boards for me and the kids. But I consoled myself with the thought that the prediction for Monday was a balmy 12 degrees Fahrenheit. Rob would have to rent his at the resort, but getting them on base saved us about $50.

We got a late start, which was fine. Rob and I figured we'd get a lesson, goof around an hour and go, anyway--I mean, 12 degrees?!

As we hit the road, we looked at the temperature gage on our car: -9.

It had warmed to -6 by the time we got to Bottineau in the Turtle Mountains. (Elevation 2600 feet! That's--what?--half the elevation of downtown Denver? But oh, how they advertise. All along the road we say signs: --> Elevation 1617. --> Elevation 2205. We weren't quite sure what the elevation was where we were, since all the signs had a little hand pointing off to the right. Must be higher to the east.

Bottineau is a little resort with Black Dimond slopes that probably count for a nice blue in Colorado. However, we were interested in the bunny slope, anyway. Lessons, we discovered were free! So armed with lift tickets and an instructor, we made our way to the tow rope. That's where the trouble began.

First, everyone's board had the feet facing the wrong way. I had to remove my gloves to twist the attachments. What moved so smoothly in a nice warm rec center fought me out in the sub-zero. I was ready to cry, but I got them twisted.

Our instructor showed us how to latch both feet in and hop to the tow line. Only Alex was brave enough to try.

One by one, the kids grabbed the line and went up. Liam refused to go. Rob finally, convinced him by assuring him he'd be right behind. Of course, Rob lost his grip on the line about a third of the way up. Then Liam lost his. As he went scooting down the hill, doing very well but scared out of his wits and screaming, "How do I stop?" I let go of the time to rescue him. Of course, I had no idea how to stop either, so I struggled to keep my own balance, with my glasses fogging and my hat slumping past my eyebrows, I was shouting "You're doing great! Just fall on your butt!"

In the end, he slid to a nice gentle stop and I fell on my butt. That's when I learned that I was not limber enough to reach my release catch without some serious strain.

Of course, after that experience, Liam refused to attempt the slope again. As he lay on the snow--now he had no trouble with falling back--I looked up the hill for my husband. Maybe he could give Liam that "you can do it speech"--

As I looked up, I say Rob take what was his fourth or fifth tumble of the run.

"I quit!" he announced. "I want to ski. This S(&*s!"

So I left him with Liam and made my way up the hill. At least three of the kids were enjoying themselves. Alex and Amber were especially thrilled. At the top, Steven informed me that he does better with his feet in the other direction.

After another few frozen frustrating minutes trying to push the little pegs and twist the stupid boot latch, I declared defeat. I couldn't tell the difference between front and back anyway. I turned to the instructor. "Is there any reason he can't just turn the board around?"

He told me the front was longer than the back. I measured with my boot. If they were, it was negligible. I looked at the bunny slope, thought of my son's mission--get down in one piece--and declared, "You can turn the board around. it's not like you're going to hot dog." Off he went.

Now to get down in one piece myself.

The instructor showed me how to go and how to stop. You have to lift your back foot, swing your board so it's perpendicular to the slope and lean back on your heels. Easy, right? I pushed off, got a little speed, swing my foot around, leaned on my heels--

--and kept on sliding until I fell on my butt.

He stopped, told me again how to stop, then showed me how to get up. You swing your board around (there's a lot of that in snowboarding, apparently), so that you are on your stomach, then lean back on your heels. I swung my board around, feeling pretty proud of myself (my muscles complained later) and got up--

and started sliding backwards. I managed to twist so I was sort-of facing downhill.

20-20 hindsight, I should have asked him how to steer.

"Uh, you really want to try to stay away from the fence," he suggested, as I lay face first, my board tangled in orange rope and frankly laughing my head off.

"Thanks. I'll get the message to my feet!"

I fell twice more getting down the hill and came to the same conclusion as my husband. thanking the instructor for his patience, I left the kids with him and traipsed to the ski shack. Inner tubing. That was my speed.

In the end, all the kids elected to inner tube. Steven got tired of falling on his butt. Amber sprained her wrist but wants to go again. Alex, naturally, loved it, but tubing is more fun. Rob traded the board for skis and had the time of his life. I ended up in the cantina and running back and forth to the car for the kids.

We stayed about 4 hours. On the ride home, the temperature read -5.

Snowboard rental: $67.50
Skis and lift tickets: $137
Inner tube rental: $18
Snacks on the way home (including hot soup for me): $25
Bragging rights for snowboarding in subzero weather: Priceless.

A Laptop, and Idea, and Thou--the Romance of Collaboration

People laugh sometimes when I tell them that my idea of a romantic evening with my husband is collaborating on a story. However, when we are working together on a story, I see again all the things that made me fall in love with Rob.

Rob is an attractive man, but that isn't what drew me to him. From the beginning, it's been his humor, his analytical skills and his ability to apply his encyclopedic knowledge that I've found admirable and, yes, sexy.

As we married and our lives joined not only spiritually but in the mundane realm of shared experiences and common goals, there was still a lot to talk about and share, but rehashing what went on at work and what the babies had done that day can get old. We've always been great communicators--a result of spending our first two years of marriage with an ocean dividing us--so when we did go on dinner dates, we needed something new to talk about.

So we started making up stories.

Our first venture, nearly 10 years ago, happened while I was writing a series on different orders of nuns and Rob was involved in Artemis Society, a group trying to establish a commercial presence on the moon. Those common experiences got us thinking that someday, humans were going to have a viable commercial presence in the solar system, and the Catholic Church would want to follow--but how? We decided on an order of intrepid nuns who did dangerous search and rescue work in outer space. By working for "air, supplies and the Love of God," they undercut the commercial competition in the S&R field and forced a path for religious in space.

"Leap of Faith" was our first story. That story has led to others--indeed to a whole universe!--and to three anthologies: Leaps of Faith (coming Summer 2008 from The Writers' Café Press), Infinite Space, Infinite God (Twilight Times), and Infinite Space, Infinite God II (accepting submissions now!)

The creative process is exciting for us. As we bat ideas back and forth and hammer out problems, I get to see Rob's mind in action in something that isn't just work related (which gets familiar and old). I can toss the most unlikely things out at him--how do you have a fistfight in microgravity? In fact, much of our collaborating is the two of us hammering out the plot, me writing, and him providing "tech support".

We laugh a lot, too, but we do that, anyway. Still, it's nice to do something with our unique (well, okay, odd) humor beside banter puns.

The key, though, and maybe it's selfish, but when we collaborate, he's focused on something that is just ours--not his and work, not ours and kids'--just his and mine together. And my focus is there, too--not on the house, the obligations of my other writing--just on what we're doing for fun. He challenges my mind to keep up with his, finding new angles, posing new situations. I feel smarter and stronger when we collaborate--and that's romantic (even sexy), too.

The past few years, Rob's work has taken away from our collaboration time, and I find I have to fight to get "storytime" with him. But he's always there when I have a question or a conundrum--and always with an answer that blows me away. We steal what time we can, and dream of the days when kids are in college and Rob's retired and we can really write together.
It's going to be amazing.

w00t! The Catholic Writers' Conference Online!

Found this while looking up I-can't-remember-what: The 2007 Word Merriam-Webster Word of th Year is W00T:

1. w00t (interjection) expressing joy (it could be after a triumph, or for no reason at all); similar in use to the word "yay"

w00t! I won the contest!
Submitted by: Kat from Massachusetts on Nov. 30, 2005 23:18

(I find it interesting that she submitted it in 2005. See the runners-up.)

Well, w00t! is how I'm feeling about the Catholic Writers' Conference Online. When we started organizing this in November, we had our hesitations about how many high-quality presenters we'd find--after all, on-line conferences are new and not well-known. However, we've had an outpouring of support from some major players in the publishing world--from writers to publishers, agents and marketing experts.

Here's out latest media release. For more, check out the site at www.conference.catholicwritersguild.org. Be sure to register!

Catholic Writers to Hold Online Conference

World Wide Web--Writers, editors, agents, and other publishing professionals from around the world are gearing up for the first annual Catholic Writers’ Conference Online, which will be held May 2-9, 2008, and is sponsored by the Catholic Writer’s Guild and Canticle magazine. The conference, which will be conducted entirely through the Internet, is free of charge and open to writers of all levels. It will feature online seminars, chats, and forums throughout the week on a variety of topics. Sample topics and presenters include:

• Balancing Your Life and Writing, by best-selling author Donna-Marie Connor O’Boyle
• Can Your Query Pass the Seven-Second Test? by Canticle editor Heidi Hess Saxton. Heidi will also be presenting The Good Writer: Seven Important Habits.
• Ethics of Memoir Writing, by magazine editor and freelance writer Melanie Rigney
• Self-Publishing as a First Resort by author and self-publisher Meredith Gould
• Funds for Writers, by Hope Clark (her website, www.fundsforwriters.com, has been in Writer’s Digest’s 101 Best Websites seven years running)
• Marketing Basics, by Carolyn Howard-Johnson (speaker, editor and author of The Frugal Book Promoter and Frugal Editor) and Karina Fabian (award winning writer and editor of Infinite Space, Infinite God)
• Pitching and Working with Agents, by agent Terry Burns
• So, You Want to Write a Book? by journalist and NCR correspondent Tim Drake
• Virtual Book Tours, by CWG Guild President and sci-fi writer Karina Fabian

In addition to attending seminars, aspiring and published authors alike will have outstanding opportunities to attend moderated chats from important industry contacts, including Vinita Hampton Wright (bestselling author and editor of Loyola Press), Ami McConnell (senior fiction editor at Thomas Nelson), Bert Ghezzi (veteran author and acquisitions editor of Word Among Us Press), and Lisa Hendey (founder of CatholicMom.com and Catholic Moments podcast). Other presenters include best-selling author Tom Grace and award-winning author Tim Powers.

Karina Fabian, president of CWG and chair of the event, said the conference gives writers an unprecedented opportunity to learn and network. “Online Conferences are ideal for writers, and especially for those who are shy, have physical disabilities or are on a tight budget. We’re harnessing the power of the Internet to reach people worldwide to support each other in our writing and our faith.”
Early registration is recommended, as some courses will have limited openings that will be filled on a first-come, first serve basis. Donations are accepted; proceeds will go toward future conferences. To register or for more information, go to http://www.conference.catholicwritersguild.org.